I've been contemplating things in life lately.
Do you believe in fate? Or does that thought terrify you?
Are you where you are in life for a reason? Are you stuck at the dead end job for a purpose?
Do you believe in God? Or a god, or any higher power? Or are you Atheist?
Either way, life seems to be terrible for everyone, and its all because of money.
Welcome to the second great depression. Just in modern times. People losing jobs, homes, and hope.
I'm 23 years old and I've alreaady acumulated a decent debt. Having your bank call you saying your car payment is two months late is a wake up call. But now a days, It just seems to happen.
So instead of being sad, depressed, and utterly horrible I try to think of it as an oppurtunity.
To rise above what you've been given. Everything I have is a blessing. A family, a place to live... and a car... well for now. I have a smile attached to my face at work and inside I may be crying. I thought my life would have been so much different than how it is now.
In high school I believed I'd have a career by now. I'd be investing in something more. Hell I had serious reltionships where I believed I'd get married...twice. Yet I never did. I have no kids, I have no rings, and at the moment I don't even have a significant other.
But I'm still here. Smiling, and belieiving that something is meant to happen to me. Did God put me here to spread happiness? Am I here to prove that no matter what happens in life you can still display your megawatt smile?
I don't make enough money to float really, and I can see myself resorting to selling things I really care about in the future if I can't get my foot in the door. I don't ever want to sell my camera, or my car... but I might not have a choice soon.
I know my job sucks, its not a dream job or even something ANYONE would want to do in life.
No kid tells their parents "when I grow up I want to work at El pollo loco/ any fast food resturant" because even when your little you are smart enough to realize how much it sucks.
I keep searching online, for video/ editing jobs. They all require degrees or some sort of certificate... I would love to go to school, but its so much money. Plus I've seen some stuff from those grads that don't really stand out. Not everyone has the passion for the tedious tasks of digital video production. But I do, I know I have a passion that shines. I just need to keep pushing and polishing my skills. I know I'll get noticed, if not I will MAKE myself noticed, if I keep my faith.
C'mon faith, don't let me down.
-Kristen
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3 comments for this post
Faith will only do so much. You can't wait around and hope that things will turn out for the best. Positive thinking does help on a subconscious level I suppose. Never stop believing in you and try not to become complacent. Just know that life is going to be a bitch at times, but don't let that discourage you from your dreams.
Thanks for the comment. I'll try not to stop making my videos, or give up my stride.
I believe the sum of all of our actions makes what we are. Do not be let down by your current situation, and don't equate it to "fate". By definition, the nature of your fate only reveals itself at the very end.
You have a number of followers, you obviously captivated them with your presentations so there's no need to worry about your abilities. I normally would say to stay in school no matter what because even though a degree is just a piece of paper, people will evaluate you on that piece of paper.
In your case however, I believe it's more of a technicality. In case of video editing, I believe a portfolio is much more valuable than any college degree. Keep doing what you do, keep improving and learning on your own, and I am sure you will build up something that could impress future employers.
See if you qualify for financial aid anyways and continue going to school if you can.
As for relationships, don't worry about kids yet, you're 23 and that's still too soon!
As for the previous poster, I agree with him that positive thinking helps a little. You're VERY far from the point of no return so that shouldn't even cross your mind. Don't rely too much on positive thinking either as it may seem it's working just because you cope with the situation better.
Good luck with everything!